Pondering

Usually as I sit to write a blog, I have something in particular to share... but this time I'm just inspired to write due to a couple of my friends who have blogs and so honestly share what God is doing in there lives... even when it reveals their 'humanness'...
I've said it before that this year was by far the hardest year of our lives... so much tearing out the old, healing, restoring, etc... We have seemingly had to go down to the very foundation of our lives, our marriage, our parenting and try to figure out what solid ground we really had to stand on. We are so humbled when we take a look and realize that we have nothing... N-O-T-H-I-N-G good in us... we are selfish, we are egotistical, we are truly full of yuck! We might fool ourselves into believing we have good intentions, but to be truly selfless means we don't have ulterior motives, we do it not because it feels good in any way, shape or form... but because we are letting God work in and through us... but for that to work... we gotta get rid of a lot of that garbage in us first. This involves work!!! Seriously, there are days when it feels like we would like to just crawl in bed with the covers over us! However, it's like Paul says... 'we keep pressing on towards the prize'... you see... it IS going to be worth it! We ARE being refined! We are being purified like gold. (Course that means we have to go through the fire first!) SO I guess the question is... do we WANT to get to the other side? Do we want to be a better person? Or would we rather just stay in our lives, just the way things are... (like that's working out so great!) So... we continue to make the choice, moment by moment, day by day... to keep on walking, knowing God is stregnthening us enough for this moment, then the next... until eventually we are the beautiful workmanship He has created!
I know in my heart that all we have/are going through is for the good... I KNOW that... but does it feel 'good'... heck no!! But I also don't want to stop mid refining and think that I'm done, I'm
good enough'... no... GOd doesn't call us to be good enough, He calls us to be GREAT!
So... we keep on plugging along, trusting in the ONE who is the Healer and Restorer of our souls!