But I don't WANT to (dang it!)

Imagine if you will... saying that and stomping your foot for emphasis. I recently attended a delivery that when push came to shove (literally), she just took this stance and eventually, we went to the hospital and she ended in a c-section. It was definitely one of those days where I leave wondering why I am a midwife! However... I always ask God to reveal to me what I can learn from my laboring mamas. Nothing came to mind too quick on this one... however by the next morning I found myself at a point of frustration between Joe and I that seems to come up over and over again in our marriage... and I so felt inwardly like stomping my foot and just telling God I just didn't WANT to deal anymore! lol... hmmm... instantly that little conviction light went off! Just like my laboring mom, I could choose to not push through the pain and get my reward, or... I could cop out and miss out on the amazing growth that can take place (if I'm willing!) Anyway, maybe it only makes sense to those who have experienced that moment in birth where it's a choice to push through the pain. (Or maybe you've experienced it in LIFE!)
Anyway.... I like birth, God teaches me many things through it! :) And even after all of this... I still love my job!

Of course....

Joe and I recently agreed to co lead a small core group at our church. The subject... the book of James. In my mind this week was persevering through trials so that we can mature... Hmmm, are little warning bells going off in your head yet? YEah..... so it really just came down to what would be our trial.... we just didn't expect to be hit on so many fronts at once!! Kid issues... attitude problems, laziness, negativity... then came the hit on the financial front... our bus repair cost... $3100.... then w/ in half hour of leaving the shop, it completely dies!!! Argh! The part that most likely needs replaced grand total is like $850... Then my cars radio freaked out... new one $250... sigh. It's been a crazy bad month at work.... lots of transports and not so many births..... I think I forgot what it looks like when a baby comes out naturally!! On another front we've been attacked by the nasty winter yuck bug!!!
However... as I was leaving work... I was singing that song... "Count your blessings, name them one by one" And I was reminded that even though it feels horrible and no one wants to be squeezed or stretched... I really do have hundreds, even thousands of blessings to count. And so I did just that... started naming them out loud... one by one! I could totally see my dad singing that song as he used to when I was growing up...
So, even if you're discouraged today... your kids being a total rebellious brat, your boss is ticked at you, your husband forgot your birthday... whatever... just remember, it's all about what we focus on.
So... I'm off to focus on my childrens homework... love love LOVE IT!!! ;)

Our crazy n strange bunch!

Since I've lacked in the picture department... here you go... all taken since this last summer.

Need I say anything about this picture?

Samking in his eating contest... believe it or not, he didn't win!

Joziah is loving his scouts! Not so much into the winter camping, but looking forward to this summer when they are supposed to go to Hawaii (if he can raise the money that is!)

Sadly... the beautiful school room Joe built doesn't get used much since we put most of the kids in public school... but it still looks cool!

The kids harvested potatoes this last fall. They had a super fun time! (What kid wouldn't when an adult tells you that you can dig in the mud?)

Yeah...not so much a morning person!

Adara... growing up already!

Tonia... growing up waaaay to fast!

My cutie, drooling girl!

Levi holding his guinea pig

So... there you go... a little insight into our world! Every time that I want to whine and complain... I remember the verse to count my blessings... so I name them... Tonia, Joziah, Sam, Brian, Tyler, Meghan, Levi and Adara. And even when I don't feel like it's such a blessing being a mom (and believe me... there are definitely MOMENTS!)... I just try to remember to be thankful for their health and the vibrance they bring to my life! And to just be happy that there is never a dull moment in this life!

Blessings!!